Auspice- notes on anything (comments be welcome)

[Auspice]

I hate the desert.
I really hate the desert.
If there's anything worse than a scorching hot desert in the middle of nowhere, don't tell me because I think I'd just go cry.
You know what? When I get enough money I'm going to buy a lake. Then I'll dump the lake into the desert. Stupid desert.
You have to wear SHOES in the desert! Shoes! Shoes are just idiotic. Humans and their shoes, disgusting.
Dust storms.
Heat stroke.
Giant worms popping out of the ground from nowhere, ready to devour you for not walking properly. (or at least, that's what I've heard. The rumors you hear- right?)
There's a fortune to be made helping those slave traders- dirty money, but I've done worse.
You know, I've seen a few pigeons in the cliffs, too. Pigeons! Nearly my own flesh and blood! Don't they know better?

[Auspice]

Prisons are fun, really. Everyone goes on about the torture and interrogations, but that's just because they have something against blurting out all their information and just enjoying the ride.
Loyalty- that's the problem. That's why I avoid it. You'll stop beating my face in if I give you names? Hell, I'll give you the names of every client I've ever had. Did I ever pretend I'd save their names if I got caught? Naw. I didn't. Most of my clients bought me off of another client anyways.
But yeah. You can always play gambling games with the other prisoners, and if you act crazy then they'll be doubly fun. The guards let their, uh, guard down, if you act crazy too. They'll even joke with you. Hey- we both know I'm going to be dead in a few hours, why be angry about it? (Of course, the trick is turning into a pigeon and flying away as soon as there's an opening.)
Now, birds don't belong in cages and I'm no exception. Going to prison sucks. But you've got to make the best of it so you don't start hitting your head off of the wall.
It's good to get into the habit of not going to prisons, but if you're doing it as regularly as I am, the second-best habit is to at least make the trip enjoyable.
Besides- they usually only give you rice (Or simmilar cheap grainy junk) to eat. I can eat that stuff! In public, even!

[Auspice]

Flaming bottle trick: It's easy.
It's fun.
(And no, you don't light the bottle. I've been informed that it's the RAG you light. Technicalities.)

Prostitutes: Never wanted to be one. Could never afford one. Sure seems like a respectable career, I suppose.

Gags: Only awesome when you put them in somebody else's mouth. I'd have to say- not the most entertaining experience. I think it's worse than going deaf or blind. I'd rather have output than input, I suppose.

Am I rambling? Maybe I am.

[Auspice]

That guy with the gray horse from the Boil*: I don't think he likes me. I don't mind him. Seems like a good source for information. He'd be fun to cut up, too. Seriously. I bet he'd wet himself too. That's always fun.
Take it slow.
Maybe I'll throw in a dishrag. He doesn't much like those, from what I've seen.

That Cougar Chick**: Not my taste, to be honest. Then again, I'm more Human than Shifter these days. That might be the problem. And to think I was born a full-fleged pigeonshifter. To think both of my parents were born shifters as well!

The fact that I don't know any names: Shame. Nobody wants to trust me, I suppose.
I should hit them and make them tell me.
Then cut them up.


(*Winter, but Auspice wouldn't know this.
**Aura.)

[Auspice]

Perhaps a trip down memory lane is in order.
Really, it's the Duci woman.
I mean, ignoring women is pretty easy for me most of the time. I dunno, it isn't that I don't look... They normally just don't catch my attention like they used to. It doesn't help that most of my taste is for Humans these days. She isn't much like the Human women at all, and that's what's strange. She's the one who's been bringing all of those memories back up to the surface where they don't belong. What, ten years ago? Something like that. Twenty years, maybe.
It's been twenty years? Wow. Twenty years since I started truly, truly wishing I was Human.

Maybe I'll explain all of that some time. Maybe.

[Auspice]

Cala'cal: I'm going to do the best I can to not get killed following this woman around. Let's just hope her antics get HER killed first. Then I just run.

Gabriel: Bigot.
Terrifying Bigot.
Note to self- DO. NOT. get. him. angry. again.

[Auspice]

Humans.
I just don't get it, everyone hates them. Yah?
So, I said I'd explain it some time, so here it is.

She was an avian Shaman. Totally obsessed with birds, always feeding them outside her house. Mostly pigeons, it being the city and all. She liked the songbirds better, but everyone got seeds regardless.

For a long while she didn't know I existed. I looked like the rest of them, just another fat lazy pigeon looking for a quick meal. Some would call it creepy, how I'd always just sit around with the regular birds. But what could I do? She was already married after all.

I hated that one. Human, and not the least bit nice to her. She totally deserved better.

He would leave sometimes, I think he was in the trading business, he mostly stuck to the city, but sometimes he'd go off to check out a new item or something. I don't know. Don't care. The point is, one of those trips I decided to show up on the second-story window and introduce myself.

Probably would have went over better if I'd arrived as a Human instead of traveling there as a bird. You know, clothes and such.

Anyways, she got used to me showing up on her windowsill eventually. I'd just be sitting there one afternoon when her husband was out, sometimes she'd throw birdseed at me and shut the glass, throw the curtains shut, other times she'd talk to me. It took a long time for her to decide to let me into the house.

We usually just... I dunno, chatted. Sometimes she'd complain about her husband, I'd complain about him for her if she didn't, since I'd seen most of it anyways. After a while she started to think of me as more than the pigeon-man in the window, I think. I dunno, I've never been too lucky with women, I was fine just talking every day. About, you know, the Human Avian goddess (or was it a he?), that sort of thing. Never expected to get any closer than a chair in the kitchen.

I maintain to this day that it was her idea.

I suppose her husband suspected something long before he caught us, but eventually he did catch us. Beat me near to death, I don't even want to know what happened to her. She stopped feeding the birds, anyways.

I dunno. After that I thought, you know, if I were Human I'd be able to do something about that sort of thing.
I still think Humans are wonderful creatures. Totally amazing things.